My “new years” entry is month late -_-
Oh well I guess this is going to be a Chinese New Year entry?
To this day I’m still quite amazed how I typed this whole entry on my Ipod Touch =)
January 1st 2011
Location: Hong Kong
I’m currently writing this entry along Victoria Harbor in Hong Kong. It’s ironic that I’m ending 2010 where I started it. This year was definitely a tough one, but I couldn’t be happier with how it ended. Sometimes I’m really surprised how things after a shit storm spontaneously work out better than initially expected.
Back in January, I was so worried about getting into pharmacy school and that I would be stuck doing biochemistry for the rest of my life. At the time, I couldn’t see myself ever being happy with my major and at WPI. But I was lucky. I met amazing people and friends at WPI and actually enjoyed my major after my MQP project at UMass. I mean shit… I’m getting my name put in a paper soon too 🙂
Who would have figured that I would graduate with distinction as well, especially after my sophomore bomb? Along with that I found out I got accepted into pharmacy school on my birthday! I swear I was really lucky to have the chance to do all these things.
However the biggest miracle happened during graduation. My dad for once was actually proud of me and realized I actually had potential to do big things. This is the man who kicked me out of the house and telling me I was the worst son he could possibly have. Even though my family is still pretty fucked up, I know I now have a loving and supporting brother, mother, and yes… father now. I really couldn’t ask for more.
Unfortunately this year wasn’t completely filled with happy news… That’s life 😦
I never thought I would see the day Zarina would break up with me. It was the first time I really truly loved someone (unconditional love). Everything started going down the shitter once I left Hong Kong a year ago. Turns out the long distance really did get to her. I could never blame her for that… After all it was difficult. I noticed her feelings changed and weren’t really there anymore. It was a tough fact that I couldn’t accept at the time because I was literally willing to do anything for her. That feeling of helplessness and being unable to do anything to fix the problem sucked even more. I tried my hardest to make things work and shit… It still didn’t workout. Hell I was even willing to move to Hong Kong and start a new life there.
After calling many times trying to figure out what the hell was going on, I finally wrote a letter, confronting her about her actual feelings… After waiting for a few weeks, I finally got a reply.
I received a breakup letter on a USB. It really sucked knowing that she couldn’t straight up tell me. I went through all the stages lol… Denial, fantasy, and regression (yea I went ghetto for a bit), etc… Maybe that’s why I did so well in psychology that summer :p
I spent most of my summer mopping around and being depressed. But it started some good things as well. I started Brazilian jiujitsu and fighting for most of the summer. I bought robo hamsters (sashimi, nigeri, maki) so I wouldn’t feel lonely. It was really a tough period in my life… But with the help of amazing friends it was bearable… That and NYC trip with Peter Lugers steak 🙂
It wasn’t until pharmacy school when I started getting much better. I met people (Team Asia) that inspired and motivated me back to help others, which was a trait I lost during WPI. Slowly i began realizing Zarina was not worth my tears anymore. Although I had my nigga moments, I accepted the fact she was seeing someone new and that I should move on too. It doesn’t make sense to hold on to something that wasn’t there anymore. Even though Zarina meant a lot to me, I realized that the things I would do for her wouldn’t be reciprocated. Thinking back on it, it really was her loss. But to leave on a positive note, I still do care and I wish you the best 🙂
Shortly after my nigga moment, I remember driving to Worcester and bringing all my pickup artist books. At the time I was like “fuck it… I’m going to neuter myself and just have fun”. And I did just that.
I stopped worrying about what I didn’t have and just had fun living my life in school and on the weekends 🙂
But despite my promise to myself to neuter myself for the next three years, I started becoming interested in another girl 🙂 I still remember one of the first questions we ever talked about… “Would you rather get a blowjob from charmander or a handjob from Geodude?”… That and our Halloween picture of me sticking my hand up your bush 🙂
That’s how you hit on girls 😉
Since Halloween and the pokemon question, my life really took a 180. I forgot what it was like to have a normal relationship (dating a Chinese girl… I mean a non-long distance relationship).
You make me take off my contacts at night and take the sponge out of the sink after I wash the dishes. I blush when people (my brother) points out my hickies on my neck. You showed your support when you showed up to my first fighting match/competition when no one else showed up.
Most of all, your always there for me, even when I’m sick and dying on your bed from bad Bon Chon or when I’m halfway across the world, depressed with the many table for ones and old memories of Hong Kong. I can always count on you waking up next to me or pillow talking when I’m about to sleep. And plus your my number one trophy wife with little yello by your side 🙂
Wanty Phu… I really do love you. I’ve been through so many heartbreaks it’s pathetic. But you make me feel like one of the luckiest guys ever and was definitely my best present this year… Well minus the AIDS.
Anyway enough of this lovey dovey shit. Some of you might be asking “okay… So you have a new gf… Why are you in Hong Kong?”
Originally I wanted in person closure. My friends were supposed to meet me here, but shit happened and they couldn’t go… I didn’t cancel the ticket becaue I figured it would be nice to get away one last time. However, it’s been really difficult spending so much time alone here. Despite the many table for ones, I’ve met really cool people here both old and new (especially at Kowloon BJJ) and will never forget the memories and experiences I had. Plus I have a loving trophy wife at home motivating me to stay happy 🙂 But truthfully I don’t have anything left here in Hong Kong anymore.
But rather than focusing on shit I don’t have, I’ll focus on what I do have… a loving sexy girlfriend, family, friends, a professional career, weights, fighting with sweaty men, and an STD test…. (please no aids?)
Bye 2010… You’ve treated me well but this shit is over….
Happy 2011! Too bad the world ends next year 😦
Sent from my iPod